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My Husband Died- Our Relationship Could not
My husband and I got together in rugged circumstances, both these styles us to the rebound through previous uncomfortable breakups. Continue reading
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Desperate times call for desperate measures, such as gatecrashing your ex lover’s wedding while wearing an elaborate bridal gown.
A video has gone viral of a stunned bride watching her groom’s ex-lover grab her man, drop to her knees and yell, ‘It’s my fault.’
The emotional ex constantly tugs the groom’s suit jacket while begging him for forgiveness.
But the groom isn’t impressed. He keeps pulling away.
A woman in China gatecrashed her ex-lover’s wedding wearing a bridal gown and all. Picture: Sina NewsSource:Supplied
The groom’s stunned (real) bride looks on as he tries to console her. Picture: Sina NewsSource:Supplied
The wedding crasher then sits on the floor with her hands in her face.
The new bride and groom were about to kiss on stage when the debacle unfolded.
The ex was adamant she would win her man back as she tried again to grab his black jacket, screaming.
During this point he consoled his bride as the embarrassing event unfolded.
But the hysterical ex wasn’t done. She began tugging at her ex again before sprawling on the floor. Picture: Sina NewsSource:Supplied
But the woman’s hysterical behaviour prompted the real bride to storm off the stage in anger.
The groom went after his wife, leaving his ex crying.
At one point during the cringe-worthy proceedings, the MC tried to salvage the wedding by quoting a famous proverb: ‘If you ask life what love is, it is to devote your life to someone else.’
The ceremony reportedly took place in China.
It caused the bride to storm off. Picture: Sina NewsSource:Supplied
The groom followed his bride out, leaving his ex absolutely shattered as she sat on the floor in tears. Picture: Sina NewsSource:Supplied
The footage was first shared online by an entertainment blogger and has since been widely shared by Chinese media.
According to Star Video, affiliated to Hunan Legal Channel, the groom split from his ex-girlfriend because they had different personalities.
The bride and her family were reportedly aghast at the love rival’s appearance.
The ‘fake’ bride allegedly stormed into the ceremony before causing mail order bride chinese the cringe-worthy scene. Picture: Sina NewsSource:Supplied
Web users on Weibo, the Chinese equivalent to Twitter, have expressed their support for the bride and condemned the ‘unreasonable’ ex-girlfriend, The Daily Mail reported.
‘Do not destroy other’s relationship to satisfy your own obsession,’ one person commented.
‘This is exactly why you can’t be friends with an ex,’ another user said, while a third wrote: ‘This is more than inappropriate. From the stand point of the bride, how could the wedding carry on?’
Sophia (as she chooses to be identified), a resident of Pakistan’s Faisalabad was 19-years-old when a Chinese man came to ask her hand in marriage promising a life of comfort and money to her parents. A month into the alliance, Sophia struggled to return to her country scarred by the abuse and web of pretense spun by her suitor, reports BBC.
Unfortunately, in Pakistan, there are many like her who have vowed to never look back on their past having returned home from China, but not all the brides many of them minor have been lucky to escape.
A Chinese ‘market for wives’
Sophia is one of among several poor Christian girls trafficked to China to cater to a ‘bride market’ that has grown swiftly over the years. Hundreds of brokers are engaged in the process of finalising marriage deals between Chineses men looking for foreign wives, as they promise to bear all expenses and even pay the parents of the woman handsomely, in some cases. They are helped by Christian clerics who are paid to target impoverished families in their congregation with promises of wealth in exchange for daughters.
Parents are told that their new sons-in-law are wealthy Christian converts, who show all signs of religious cooperation in their initial meetings before the match is finalised. However, once in China, the women find themselves isolated in remote rural regions, vulnerable to abuse, and unable to communicate due to the language barrier.
Given the wretched state of minorities in Pakistan which is yet to come out of the shadows of maximal blasphemy laws the families of such women often find themselves bereft of social security and thus, struggle for justice. Human rights activists in Pakistan believe it is the greed of the parents which leads to young girls being forced to marry against their will in return for the money offered by prospective Chinese men.
Muqadas Ashraf, one of the trafficked brides, spoke to The Associated Press in Gujranwala, Pakistan. AP
Meanwhile, Ijaz Alam Augustine, the Human Rights and Minorities Minister in Pakistan’s Punjab province accused the Chinese government and its embassy in Pakistan of turning a blind eye to the practice by unquestioningly issuing visas and documents, a claim China has so far vehemently denied citing “zero tolerance for illegal transnational marriage agencies”, as reported by The Associated Press.
Recently, Pakistan’s Federal Investigation Agency arrested eight Chinese nationals and four Pakistanis in multiple raids in the Punjab province in connection with trafficking, Geo TV reported. As per the report, the Chinese embassy said that China was cooperating with Pakistan in its effort to crack down on unlawful matchmaking centers. Even though, reports by The New York Times and the BBC show that such centres continue to thrive and that repeated claims by both the nations on curbing the menace were far removed from the ground reality.
Trafficked from Pakistan, abused in China
In recent weeks, Pakistan has been rocked by charges that at least 150 women were brought to China as brides under false pretenses and subjected to various forms of abuse including sexual harassment and physical violence. A few victims of this practice told The New York Times that they were forced into prostitution, or made to work in bars and clubs.
Human Rights Watch in its note issued in April said that the trafficking allegations were ‘disturbingly similar’ to past patterns in which women from other penurious Asian countries North Korea, Myanmar, Cambodia, Laos, and Vietnam were brought to China as brides and subjected to abuse.
Christian, Muslim women targeted
And this is not just the case of marginalised Christian women in Pakistan, even Muslim women from poor families are being trapped in this trade which amounts to serious charges under human trafficking laws which are being blatantly violated to allow such cartels and cross-nation syndicates to operate.
A Muslim woman from a poor Lahore neighbourhood who went to China with her husband revealed that she had to put up with repeated physical abuse because she refused to sleep with the “drunk visitors” her husband brought over. Her husband, she later found out had faked his religion and was not a practicing Muslim as claimed by him during his stay in Pakistan, the report states.
While in China, the women have to resort to the help of the Pakistani embassy for their rescue and return to the home country. Many of them are now fighting a legal battle for divorce.
Emboldened economic ties between China and Pakistan serve as catalyst to this trade
This network has been strengthened by the growing relationship between Pakistan and China and the ever-increasing economic investment being done by the dragon nation in its western neighbour through the ambitious China-Pakistan Economic Corridor (CPEC) and latest via the Belt and Road Initiative (BRI) of the Chinse government. Moreover, with Pakistan allowing visa-on-arrival to Chinese nationals, their population in the Islamic nation has increased ever since with many coming to the country as labourers.
No bride for China’s ‘only male child’
But what is actually pushing the Chinese men to seek partners in foreign lands?
Experts argue it is China’s legacy of the three-decade-old ‘one-child policy’ that has skewed the country’s gender balance toward males. Hoards of families opted for termination of pregnancies (forced abortions) or female infanticides in their desire to have a male child before the country reversed the rule to allow couples to have two children.
‘There are no girls here,’ one of the groom’s mother told The New York Times when asked why so many local men had gone to Pakistan to find wives. ‘We weren’t allowed to have more children, so everyone wanted boys,” she said. And boys they had. So many that now there aren’t enough girls in the country for them to marry.
China has one of the most heavily skewed gender ratios in the world, with 106.3 men for every 100 women as of 2017, according to the World Bank. in 2003, there were reports that in the Guangxi province, parents trying for sons sold their baby girls on the black market, and 80 percent of the trafficked babies in China were girls.
Three years after finding the love of her life, Michelle Gregory was over the moon when her boyfriend Michael asked her to marry him.
Gregory jumped online, found a company called TB Dress, searched its wedding gown catalog and, ‘I said yeah, this has got to be the dress.’
It was perfect. She sent off her check for 300 dollars. When the dress arrived in a bag, she pulled it out, and there was a big problem.
‘It’s way too big,’ says Gregory, ‘I’m a size nine. They send me a size 16.’ Not only was the dress huge, it was falling apart.
She added, ‘It’s poorly made. Some of the stuff is coming off.’ Take a look at this dress next to the one she picked out from the online catalog. ‘This dress is not even close to the one online. Not even close,’ she says.
Gregory called the company its headquarters is in China. The man who answered gave her a response she didn’t expect.
‘He said the best thing they could do was give me ten dollars and a ten dollar coupon.’ There is a seven day return policy.
She called them about two days after she received the dress, and she says they told her the seven days had expired.
Her heart sank. The money she had to buy a dress came from her dying mother, who told her, “I won’t be at your wedding but your dress will help you remember me that day.”
‘I feel like I wasted money I can’t get back,’ Gregory told 7 On Your Side. “It’s bad enough you won’t have your mother for the wedding, and now I lose my money. 7 On Your Side Call For Action executive director Shirley Rooker says beware when picking out a dress from an online company, ‘you don’t who you’re dealing with and you don’t know where they are located . And if they are outside the United States, they aren’t subject to US laws and there’s not a whole lot you can do.’
Gregory now has to find a new dress, and have it fitted in time for her wedding. 7 On Your Side has been communicating with TB Dress. The company contends Gregory did not return the dress with the seven days, and is not eligible for a refund according to its policy.
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As the end-of-school bell rings, middle schoolers immediately reach into sweatshirt pockets and colorful backpacks to reunite with their smartphones. Suddenly, the frenzy of voices is joined by the ding of new messages. Amidst the clanging lockers, students pose for photos with friends and giggle at the latest Snapchat filters. Even goodbye waves are accompanied with reminders to send messages or add each other to the latest group chat.
In their personal lives and in schools, most students eagerly embrace innovative technology and quickly gain tech fluency especially when it comes to smartphones. While proficient technology use is important, it’s not enough to prepare students to make thoughtful decisions. As the world’s future decision makers, our students must wrestle with the costs, benefits, promises, and perils of technology. National Geographic reporter Robert Draperpoints out that technology often offers the best and worst at the exact same time. In other words, most new tech isn’t all good or all bad. New infrared cameras can help save endangered pandas, for example, but they can also subject us to Orwellian surveillance.
In order for students to critically evaluate the technology they use, they need more than how-to classes. Proficient smartphone use doesn’t mean you can reasonably consider how it’s impacting your life or when you should put your phone away to focus on other things. Learning to code is great but it doesn’t prepare you to consider the way algorithms shape the social media world. Instead of just teaching students how to use technology, let’s also teach them how to think about it.
Below, I offer a few suggestions for where to start if you want to integrate critical technology thinking into your classroom.
Before you jump into tech conversations with your students, take a moment to examine your own views. Are you preoccupied with a new app’s possibility for bullying? Are you enamored by the ways a new device will make your life better?
Dana Boyd, author of It’s Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teens, points out that teachers, along with most adults, are typically divided into two tech-thinking camps: techno-utopians embrace technology as the solution to massive world problems while cyber-dystopians panic over the dire possibilities of each new change. Both schools of thought have merit, but neither is enough to teach our students how to thoughtfully analyze technological possibilities. When students think about miniscule new cameras, for example, they must use both views: On one hand, the smaller cameras may allow citizens to expose harsh government actions but they may also broadcast personal conversations without consent. Instead of falling into an extreme view, adopt a reasoned approach that considers benefits as well as costs.
Teaching how to think about technology doesn’t mean that you just load up on expensive computers or equipment. When we consider critical digital consumption as more than a how-to guide, we can build the conversations into lessons in many subjects.
During a recent fellowship at Tulsa Institute For Teachers with Dr. Denise Dutton, I researched ways to teach critical technology skills without being tied to a specific piece of technology. Literature, for example, offers plenty of opportunities. Consider Jean Craighead George’s 1959 novel ‘My Side of the Mountain,’ a text I used in my own 5th grade classroom. In the fictional, pre-internet world, protagonist Sam Gribley runs away from home and makes a life in the woody Catskill Mountains. The book offers a perfect backdrop to discuss how tech has changed the coming-of-age experience. How would Sam’s experience be different if he could just use GPS to find his destination? Would he have avoided mistakes and their accompanying discoveries if he could watch a Youtube tutorial for how to make a fire?
A novel written before a new technology comes into vogue isn’t out-of-date; it’s an opportunity to discuss how technology changes the way we live and interact. Mine your bookshelves and library turntables for texts that work for your class.
While you probably can’t cover every area of technological influence, there are plenty of smart books about the way technology is changing our students’ lives. If you’re concerned about the way that devices impact student interaction, check out MIT professor Sherry Turkle’s work. Her latest book, Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Agefocuses on how technology impacts student talk. Alone Together, also by Turkle, is a research-heavy take on how technology impacts relationships and peer connections. Another text to check out is Alan Lightman’s recently released book In Praise of Wasting Time in which he analyzes the cumulative impact of the constant connectivity made possible by smartphones, laptops, and smartwatches. A quick trip to your library or local bookstore will yield additional options.
No matter what subject you teach, consider integrating critical technology thinking. You don’t have to be a master coder, viral Youtuber, or cutting-edge social media user to guide students towards thoughtful digital consumption. Instead, think about how to leverage books or lessons that you already have. Our students need more than new gadgets to navigate the ever-evolving world of technology.
EducationWorld is pleased to present this article contributed by C.M. Rubin. The piece is part of Rubin’s online interview series Global Search for Education, in which she joins thought leaders as they explore big-picture education questions that all nations face. For this series and her other online series “How Will We Read?”, she received a 2011 Upton Sinclair award. Rubin is also the author of three bestselling books, including The Real www cpm org homework help Alice in Wonderland.
Flash forward a decade or so. How do we feel about girls and games today? How do we feel about our STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics) issues? And how do we feel about using games to help students grasp difficult math and science concepts–games that let them actively engage with learning?Doom, Duke Nukem, Abe’s Oddysee, Driver, Enter the Matrix…I watched as my husband and his business partners launched some of the biggest games in the world. ‘Is this just a guy thing?’ I wondered. What about girls? Girls wanna play games, too. ‘There is no market for girl games,’ explained the male marketing director. ‘Oh really?”
I am pleased to welcome Lucien Vattel, CEO and founder of GameDesk, and Asi Burak, President of Games for Change, to talk about Girls and Games.
Are there games that promote STEM that are created for girls? What are some of the best learning games for girls?
Asi Burak: I belong to the camp that believes that the games industry only scratches the surface in terms of potential mainstream audiences, and the breadth of issues and genres we can tackle, beyond what we’re seeing today. Fortunately, some developers and publishers recognize the huge opportunity and necessity to address girls, especially with STEM games. Our only barriers are legacy, public perception and norms. A good example, and relatively new, is PBS’s SciGirls – a TV show that is accompanied by online games and activities.
There are also bold efforts that directly aim at ‘converting’ girls into game developers, designers and coders such as Girlstart, Girls Who Code and the initiative by Dell and the Girl Scouts called Be The Game Developer. What these efforts have in common is the belief and understanding that girls and women MUST be part of this emerging medium, both as consumers and as creators.
Lucien Vattel: There are many games currently designed, particularly in the science and math areas, where female perspective is definitely taken into the design. There aren’t a lot of girl-focused games, but definitely the design-learning type games — what we call mobile sandbox type games — are targeted to girls, especially in the design and engineering process. Look at the effort being made in MineCraftEdu, for example — the amount of girl contributions is highly significant. The different sandbox type games that are out there now put kids in a position to openly design and explore, and a lot of the inventor games have kids construct Rube Goldberg or simple machines. There’s a fantastic game called Newton’s Playground that focuses on bridging natural creativity to engineering and has shown a lot of promise with the girl population.
On the bright side, there is more debate around this than ever before, and more programs and products that try to change the equation. So I’m optimistic, but it may take longer than we’d like.
Generally speaking, games are mostly developed by men and most of the big game companies are run by men. Do you think that has an impact on the appeal of the end product? Do you think there are any strategies that might be used to make the end product appealing to both girls and boys?
Asi Burak: I am confident it has a tremendous impact. The Game Developers Conference (GDC) brings together in San Francisco more than 20,000 game developers every year to discuss and engage with the latest and most exciting ideas around game design and development. However, when I look around, 90% of the attendees are white males. People in the industry speak about the lack of diversity more than ever before, but change is slow. According to the last figures I’ve seen, only 10% of the folks who work in the games industry are females. If you dig deeper and look for hard-core coders or designers, you would find only 3-4% females. Naturally, that affects the types of games being developed. It’s a chicken and egg cycle – if girls don’t find games that speak to them, and are not encouraged to become ‘gamers,’ then there is less incentive for the big publishers and developers to make products for them.
Lucien Vattel: Without a doubt, that is absolutely the case. However, in the general independent games arena, there’s been a lot of really fantastic, unique and different games that come out of girl development groups and girl-driven design groups. That hasn’t completely permeated the education space yet, but there’s an incredible amount of designers who are women. I think if you look at a game called Reach for the Sun, there were a lot of female designers on that game. So, I think the strategy to create games appealing to both boys and girls is simple — hire more women/girls.
Asi Burak: Absolutely. I was really happy to learn that Robin Hunicke, who keynoted the 2013 Games for Change Festival, is one of the faces of the Google campaign. We need big efforts and aggressive campaigns to change the very imbalanced picture. It’s great to see Robin, Leigh Alexander, Jane McGonigal, Brenda Romero and other thought-leaders emerging and changing the public perception of what the games industry is all about and what games are. At the Games for Change Festival, 50% of our speakers are females. Part of it is our intention, but the other part has to do with more females pushing the boundaries of the medium. We partnered with Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn on ‘Half the Sky Movement’ to create four games specifically designed around the empowerment of women and girls. Perhaps the best evidence that change is coming: our Facebook game has reached over 1.3 million players, and 80% of them are female. There is a clear demand for high-quality experience for women and girls; we just need to make sure we change the supply side.What do you think of the Google initiative to encourage girls to code? Will it help?
Lucien, can you tell us about games specifically related to developing math and science skills?
Geomoto focuses on earth science and geoscience through two games: Continental Drift and Plate Tectonics. This is an interactive set of games that uses LEAP Motion technology to teach players about these scientific concepts.
Continental Drift is a puzzle game that encourages players to recognize patterns and use information to make hypotheses, test theories and use reverse engineering techniques to understand geological models. The students’ mission is to return present-day Earth to its Pangea state.
We’ve found that the LEAP Motion technology, which tracks hand movement, resonates with female students, and they are more easily able to grasp difficult scientific concepts by engaging in natural, physical movements. Plate Tectonics allows students to virtually create geographic features by pulling, smashing and grinding tectonic plates together. This game also uses the LEAP Motion Controller, allowing players to produce the motion of the plates using hand gestures. Initial challenges focus on exposure to the vocabulary surrounding plate tectonics, with later levels requiring specific observations about the structures created from the plate collisions.
Mathmaker is a remedial math program that has a long history of helping at-risk students attending large urban schools struggling to reach proficient levels in mathematics. Students engage in a carefully structured series of game-making activities that require them to grapple with and apply mathematic standards in game design, game logic and game programming activities. The curriculum is designed to improve students’ mathematic proficiency, increase students’ motivation in math and positively impact students’ STEM identities.
Mathmaker was used in a pilot program in a California high school, and the data demonstrated strong quantitative and qualitative results, with an increase of an average of 20 percent on mathematics proficiency tests. Additionally, 80 percent of students posted math content improvements from pre to post-tests. The Mathmaker program allows students to create their own games by applying mathematic principles, and this allows students to create and produce games they want to play.
When given the tools to create games, we found female students to be incredibly creative, and we actually hosted a games course at a Southern California high school specifically for female students. We not only learned that a lot of girls were interested in games and game development, but also that the games they created had to do with social, cultural and emotional interactions, which is a growing market in the video game industry focusing on female players.
The word ‘compromise‘ is commonly comprehended by many as to come to terms, to settle a dispute by mutual understanding, to meet each other halfway. It is actually the correct definition but it is definitely not a requisite thing in life as most of us presume. As Edmund Burke once stated,’All government–indeed, every human benefit and enjoyment, every virtue and every prudent act–is founded on compromise.’ The word compromise indubitably holds a positive touch. When we hear about someone’s act of compromise it clearly melts our hearts.
However, it would not be imprecise to say that compromising on your goals is not always a reliable option. Sometimes you need to stand by your beliefs and principles against all odds. Many a time you have to stay determined and focused without compromising to make your mark in the pages of history. Whether we talk about leaders, sportsman or human beings which are adored by friends and foes alike, history brings testimony to the fact that they don’t compromise and standing by their beliefs to achieve their goals.
Jeremy Lin, 27, the professional American Basketball player of NBA is the best illustration of how not compromising and standing for your dreams turn your life on the path of success and fame. In his college days he was considered the weakest guy on the team but today he has established himself as a strong, fast-paced offensive player. No player would have faced so many racial issues as he did during his college. He regularly heard bigoted jeers at games. Being an Asian his fellows used to tease him by saying him to go back to his country, many a time he was made to sit on the bench instead of playing though he was a team player he never loses his ambition, he never reacted to the chants. He once said ‘I expect it, I am used to it, this is what it is’. He acclaimed his NBA success to playing without pressure. He said ‘I am not in a battle with what everybody else thinks’. Due to his standpoint and not heeding to people marks he is considered as the most famous Asian-American basketball player today in NBA.
Another prominent example from history is the great leader ‘Martin Luther King Jr’ who through his actions and fortitude showed the world how he did not compromise on his dream and brought an end to slavery and racial discrimination. Despite much opposition, allegations, and agony, he stood by his point and combat racial inequality using non-violence movement. Had he feared the admonitions of the people and compromised on his ambition , there would never have been a revolutionary change in the society.
From the above discussion, there are no second thoughts to the notion that those who do not compromise on their principles, face hardships and oppositions with courage and fortitude attain a place in the memories of people that even death fails to obscure these memories. Stephen Hawking, Oprah Winfrey, Malala Yousafzai, and J.k Rowling are the prominent people whose affiliation with their goals not only earned them fame but also made them a symbol of courage and motivation to others. Consequently, one should not compromise for the fear of failure and opposition but one should work hard and face the hardships with courage so that he may make his mark in this world.
Competition or Cooperation are certainly two opposite words. Beyond the shadow of a doubt, both play a significant role in our stages of life. Bertrand Russell in his book ‘The Conquest of Happiness’ compiles a chapter ‘Competition’ which he included in a part named ‘Causes of Unhappiness’. Many a person may not consent with him or me supporting his point that competition is actually is not a cause of satisfaction. Having in a competition with someone only gives you depression and lavishing all your time thinking about outshining the people around. Though competition urges you to become not only better but best which is actually an admiring thing, but nowadays in the avarice of becoming best one forgets about one fellow humans. In one’s zest of competing with others, one often neglect one’s family, friends or children no matter how endearing they all are, but his self-esteem does not allow him to think about anything else. Whereas, word Cooperation, on the other hand, itself holds a beautiful meaning.
Bertrand Russell writes ‘The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation‘. We are living a hectic life today. We are always busy in something or other. Similarly, we are also occupied in being egocentric. With so much advancement in life, so much struggle is needed. Indubitably we are living a better life than our ancestors, but this modern life is lacking tranquility. When we come in competition with someone we not only become obsessed with it but also form rivalries. Secondly when in a competition we only depend on ourselves. We do not care whether we would be able to reach this thing or not, we never think of its uses or drawbacks, what we only think of is to outclass everyone or to prove ourselves to everyone.
Competition to attain influence, power and dominance over others set the stage for the worst nightmares of humanity. Hitlers’ obsession for power and its consequences in the form of World War II consumed the lives of 6 million people. Wars and violent conflicts are the terrible illustrations of competition between the opposing forces which exploit each and every resource in their possession to attain might and dominance.
On the contrary, cooperating with other does not only build good relations but also enrich your mind with new and unique ideas. When we cooperate with others we meet new people, we get to know new things, we share thoughts, we help each https://homeworkmarket.me/ other and most of all we succeed together. When we reach our goal with each other’s help we celebrate it together, we can assure that there is someone always to back us up in our hard times. There exist so many examples from history, literature or even present time that shows how collaboration helped them in their tough journeys of life. Whether it was a cooperative society, cooperative leaders or cooperative humans all proved themselves to be followed as an example.
The processes of cooperation have played a major role in shaping the history. Let’s discuss the example of UN (United Nations), an intergovernmental organization that aims at promoting international cooperation and resolution of conflicts through dialogues and negotiation rather than deadly conflicts and tormenting wars. The UN’s mission is to preserve world peace and create harmony. After the second world war, a joint declaration by USA, UK, Northern Ireland, China, Belgium, Australia, CostaRica, Canada, Cuba and many other states was signed. UN was formed to get victory over the enemies of humanity. For liberty, independence, religious freedom, human benefits, and justice, all states cooperated with one another. 70 years of UN is an emphatic reminder of the notion that international cooperation is the only way to defeat the monster of terrorism, hunger, gender inequality, unemployment, and poverty. Universal Declaration of Human Rights, Food Aid, Aid to Refugees, Protecting Children, Peacekeeping missions, War Crimes prosecution and Fighting AIDS are some of the notable achievements that would have never been attained by one person.
Sports provides us with the best example of cooperation. How all members of the team forget their personal identity and work only for the benefit of the team. Although sports are competitive by nature when there is a cooperation between the members they motivate each other and play as a single entity, they pave their way to winning.
Many people especially parents believe that a competitive state is healthy for children as it prepares them to face the modern society but I believe they should tell their children more about cooperation as it helps children learn to communicate, to build good relation in society and mark their name in society by helping others.
Many people assume the word education as the knowledge gained in schools. This is common mistake as we all relate the word education to only schools, colleges or universities. Living a restless life, many beings especially parents or guardian thinks they are meeting their duties of giving their children a good future by sending their children to best schools. And why should not they be satisfied? Sending their children to best schools, providing them with all facilities, fulfilling their demands is all what makes them best and earn them prestige. We are living in the 21st century, certainly school is important, today without school education, getting a job is beyond the bounds of possibility as all career paths require education. Education is a base and everybody knows its importance too. Not only a person but also a nation can never survive without modern education.
Education is defined as the acquisition of values, skills or habits other than knowledge.You can learn skills from school of course, the main purpose of an institution is to spread knowledge, so you can become rich in knowledge of this world too.
Schools obviously teach its pupil about values. Institutions improve your personality , it gives you the knowledge of universe too but you can never guarantee reverence and success by only getting education from schools.
A little girl is bragging about her living standard, about the money they have, about her big house in front of her friends who do not belong to a very rich family or do not live in a big house. In short the girl is degrading her fellows. Whose mistake is it now that the girl is behaving in a conceited manner? Should the parents of little girl’s fellows complain to the school staff for her manners? No. Its not their concern that how is the girl’s nature. Of course, its the duty of parents to give them proper time, to make sure they are in a good company, they are not hurting their friends or fellows, they show good behavior to everyone. Parents can not complain to teachers or any institution for the bad behavior of their children at home because its not their job. Their job is only to teach them right or wrong, next comes the duty of parents to see if they observe what they are being taught.
Influence play a great role. Influence is created on anyone without any exertion of force. A mother can make her daughter behave the way she wants by rebuking her at the time but not always. Chastising does not always work. Sometimes too much criticizing or enforcement convert things from bad to worse. Mostly we repeat things just in anger to show others what we can do or not. On the other hand influence can be made without any enforcement. When you do some good act or deed, everyone try to follow it. There is a common saying; ‘Man is known by the company he keeps’
We do what people around us do. We follow things that impress us. Influence is not always good but its definitely very powerful. A good leader always leaves an influence on its people, similarly children always follows their parents’ footsteps. There are many leaders from history who showed how their influence on people led the whole nation to path of success. Still today, leaders try to influence people through their actions, dedication and passion to obtain their objectives.
A worker will never do his job properly if his boss does not take any interest in work. An executive’s charge is to create his good influence on his workers. Though he hire all well-educated or deserving candidates but why should they put so much effort in their work if the head himself does not care. Despite that they are graduates from good institutions but still comes the point we are discussing; education does not only comes from schools or it does not only mean learning or outshining others by your knowledge. It includes so many other things that result when you learn from your people around, this is why most people will agree with me that education results from Influence other than school.
Its a common adage ‘No body is perfect’. A lot of people believe in this saying but there are some who claims to be perfect or credits their perfectness for all that they have achieved. What does the word ‘Perfection’ really imply? Flawlessness, faultlessness,sublimity, magnificent; all interpret the word Perfection. Have we ever met a person in all our life who is exemplary by all means? Frankly, No. I would rather say that Perfection is the result of success not success is the result of perfection. This is certain that perfection is an impossible goal, many people easily accept their flaws or faults and give up. But this definitely not the right thing to do, accepting your faults is a good thing but giving up is at the same time the worst thing. We should never give up because we do not find ourselves perfect instead of that we should continue our struggles in the face of adversities with the talents we possess. We don’t need to be perfect but we need to be excellent in what we do. Hard work matters more for success than perfection and of course the ingredient of luck makes the recipe more delicious.
How true has Aristotle said ‘Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work’
Work needs to be done with pleasure, enjoyment and concentration. When we back down because we don’t feel perfection in it, we can never succeed. When we aim only for perfection we only surrender ourselves to stress. In continuous thirst of outshining others and becoming the best,we just waste our precious time and energy. The truth is really not that we admire perfection but we are envious of each other. We examine things on their face value and miss out necessary details though we know that we are living in an imperfect world filled with disparities, injustices, grievances and struggle at every step. If we run after perfection we will get nothing but if we do our ordinary work with assiduousness or excellency, it will definitely bring perfection in our lives.
There exists so many examples from history, literature or present that manifest how struggle of the leaders or heroes made their imperfect lives perfect that still today everyone admire.
Lets take a glance back at the life of Thomas Alva Edison, the inventor of bulb. His invents influenced so many lives around the world, in fact influenced the whole world. He was taught at home by his mother. At and early age he developed hearing deficiency. He sold candies and newspaper on train. He sometimes sold vegetables to surcharge his income. His life was not perfect by any means. He faced so many problems but that did not refrain him from struggling. His inventions include Fluoroscopy, Telegraph Improvements, Motion Pictures, Mining and Rubber. He did not invent this all at one time but he spent his life striving for these. If he had given up, we would have all been living in dark today. His life was not exemplary but after trying and succeeding he made it ideal and achieved perfection out of misery. Today people remember him by his work, many places have been named after him, museum has been built after him. And these places are created to honor his achievements.
There would be hardly any one in the world who likes complainers but along with it is also true that we all do complains for one reason or other as Dejan Stojanovic said;
‘Some people complain there are too many people on earth,
Some people complain about secret societies,
Some people accuse others of not being able to wake up early.
Almost all people complain about something.’
Bu the question is do we really need to complain for every little thing? Some think that people who make their desires or needs known to others by making noise (by complaining) are the ones who get what they want. This is a common thing that instead of changing what we don’t like, we chose complaining as the first choice. We spend too much energy in complaining which can be used to make things better. Though complaining does not always work, we still use it as a strategy.
From a playing game to a bigger exam, when we are about to lose; we protest. Since our childhood, we have been listening to a story ‘The Boy Who Cried Wolf‘. This story has always been told as a cautionary tale, the boy who cried for sympathy through unjustified ways from others definitely got it but lost their trust. Similarly, when in a game or exam we complain; we may achieve our goals but not respect. Everyone around us consider it as an achievement gained by tricky ways devoid of any praise. Like an old famous saying;
The squeaky wheel gets the grease.
This is an American-idiom that conveys idea that the most noticeable or loudest problems are the most likely ones to get attention. This means if you tell your problems loud enough to every one, you will likely get their attention but at the same time it is true that no one likes the squeaky wheel. One may get what one wants by begging or complaining but it creates an impression of weakness at the same time. Every indvidual is different from his fellows. We all have our priorities. We all think differently. Some think complaining for needs is their right. Some says its right to make noise to make your needs known. Others define complaining as weakness, way to hide your failure. Simply put, we all have our own ways of thinking and like so many people in the world I believe that the only way to attain something is through dedication and hard work. If that does not work, instead of putting and wasting vital energy in complaining we should concentrate it in solving the problem by utilizing every mean in possession. Rather than complaining its better to think of our blessings first.
Unhappiness meets us everywhere. Be it rich or poor, young or old; whoever you meet you will find that each one has its own trouble. It’s true that life surprise us at every step with new challenges, the struggle for life will always interfere with your existence. Some says that it is not true as there are some who possess everything (rich). But as I said we are humans, we love to assume things. A poor person is so occupied with his struggle for existance that he mostly found complaining of his wretched life. The rich is so worried about his business and making money (outshining others) that he also complains of his busy and hustled life. The young students always complain of their hard study life. To put in simple words, we are all struggling for success, we are all running after something. Some are busy in pleasing their GODS, some to be in good books of teachers, some in making their parents proud, some in proving themselves. Who is happy then? The simple answer is ‘Those who has become emancipated from the materialistic territory of life and find peace by helping out their fellow humans through every mean available’. They are the one who will find life much more mirthful than it used to be.
One of the sources of unhappiness is to compete with other. There exists a paradox that we wish to be like our competitor but at the same time we get preoccupied with envy and start complaining about it. We can never be happy if we continue to feel envy. All bad things are connected with each other and any one of them can become the cause of other. So is complaining, if we complain all the time it creates an impression of a jealous, weak and insolent person who always complain and never thank for the blessings he possess. If we always chose complaining for our needs to be known, it will itself become our need and we will find our self helpless in any matter without it.
To me its a negative flash, problems are meant to be solved not complained. When we find ways for solving it instead of protesting, we can not only come over our problems but also discover our hidden abilities and strength. It’s not the time to complain, it’s the time to show the critics who complain about your weakness, what you can do. Its time to bring a positive change that can never be brought by worrying or showing dissatisfaction. It can only be brought by focusing on the things that can help you in achieving what you want.
I’m Queer and Determined. Luckily, Which means that Is My lady.
My nervousness and queerness grew hand and hand, tangled along. Continue reading
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